Letters to the World

Dear Summer Holiday,

why didn't you listen to me? I told you to slow down! I told you! And now you're threatening me with impending school? That's rich, coming from something that can't even listen to simple instructions.

Yours irritably,
Me.

~

Dear BBC,

Really? Splitting the next series of Doctor Who in half? More than a year's wait for Sherlock?

Have mercy on the poor addicts!

Yours with withdrawal symptoms,
Me.

P.S: Or at least give us copious makeouts to compensate for the wait.

(CC: Stephen Moffat, Mark Gatiss)

~

Dear Spider,

I accept your right to be on my bedroom wall. That's fine. As long as you stay in one place.

In the hopes of waking up without a spider on my face,
Me.

~

Dear Wireless Router,

Stop screwing around. Some of us actually want to use the internet.

Yours exasperatedly,
Me.

~

Dear Science Coursework,

please be magically finished with no human intervention next time I look at you.

Yours in vain hope,
Me.

~

Dear Money,

Where are you? I'm sorry for calling you the root of all evil. Please come home, I need your help!

Yours contritely,
Me.

~